I am rarely disappointed. At least not by the things people do. Not because everyone I know is a great person who always makes wise, considerate decisions, but because I pay attention to the person. And from that I determine my level of expectation for that person. If he is habitually late, I never expect him to be on time. I am delighted if he is, but not disappointed when he shows up an hour and a half late. If she is consistently inconsistent, I mentally prepare for her to change her mind, plans and point of view multiple times. I am delighted if she stays on track, but never disappoint at that number of times she goes off. Thus we have my relatively low number of disappointments. Well, after this weekend I can add one more to the disappointment column.
Someone who I considered to be ‘like’ family had major surgery(heart) this past Friday. Now for me ‘like’ family means family, DNA is just a technicality. But that is a whole other post. Anyway, LF(‘Like’ Family) and I have been ‘like’ family for damn near 20 years. So even though it was late Thursday night and she was damn near 800 miles away on vaykay, she said she needed and wanted me there, so I found a way. I mean shit, its family what can you do? So I took off work, rented a car first thing Friday morning and hit I-75N for an eight hour road trip (normally 11). All of this despite the fact that LF recently broke my heart (when your girlfriends break your heart it stings, more than when a man does it) But hell, its family what can you do?
(I was going to give the extended version of this story, but fuck it. I am going to just bottom line it. Cause I don’t wanna relive this shit again.)
Bottom Line:
LF’s surgery is a complete success. She survives and everyone is happy. WoooHooo! Yippeee! She gets discharged. We leave the hospital and head back to her “mother-in-law’s” house. Now my plan was to see the kids, hang out for about 20-30mins, see if anyone needed anything (since they had all been there for damn near a week stressed out and all) and keep it moving. Well after about 15 minutes LF’s mother (a woman who I had called Ma for damn near 20 years) pulls me to the side and proceeds to tell me how inappropriate it was for me to be there. She went on to say that LF just needed to be with her family and her children. And how I shouldn’t have come. I informed her that, I asked LF if she wanted or needed me to be there, prior to coming. When she yeah, she did need me that was all I needed to hear. (I mean fuck, its family what can you do?) Her response was simply, ‘Y’all are missing the big picture, her kids should be upstairs with her not downstairs.’ (they had gone to the basement on their own accord to watch a movie. Besides that last thing a person who has just had heart surgery needs is, four kids jumping around them, but I digress). Now anyone who knows me; knows I am not good at holding my tongue and I very rarely bit my lip. But out of respect, I managed to just say ‘You know what? I am leaving.’ and not any of the other many, many things that were running across my mind at that point. I then picked up my shit and left.
Someone who I considered to be ‘like’ family had major surgery(heart) this past Friday. Now for me ‘like’ family means family, DNA is just a technicality. But that is a whole other post. Anyway, LF(‘Like’ Family) and I have been ‘like’ family for damn near 20 years. So even though it was late Thursday night and she was damn near 800 miles away on vaykay, she said she needed and wanted me there, so I found a way. I mean shit, its family what can you do? So I took off work, rented a car first thing Friday morning and hit I-75N for an eight hour road trip (normally 11). All of this despite the fact that LF recently broke my heart (when your girlfriends break your heart it stings, more than when a man does it) But hell, its family what can you do?
(I was going to give the extended version of this story, but fuck it. I am going to just bottom line it. Cause I don’t wanna relive this shit again.)
Bottom Line:
LF’s surgery is a complete success. She survives and everyone is happy. WoooHooo! Yippeee! She gets discharged. We leave the hospital and head back to her “mother-in-law’s” house. Now my plan was to see the kids, hang out for about 20-30mins, see if anyone needed anything (since they had all been there for damn near a week stressed out and all) and keep it moving. Well after about 15 minutes LF’s mother (a woman who I had called Ma for damn near 20 years) pulls me to the side and proceeds to tell me how inappropriate it was for me to be there. She went on to say that LF just needed to be with her family and her children. And how I shouldn’t have come. I informed her that, I asked LF if she wanted or needed me to be there, prior to coming. When she yeah, she did need me that was all I needed to hear. (I mean fuck, its family what can you do?) Her response was simply, ‘Y’all are missing the big picture, her kids should be upstairs with her not downstairs.’ (they had gone to the basement on their own accord to watch a movie. Besides that last thing a person who has just had heart surgery needs is, four kids jumping around them, but I digress). Now anyone who knows me; knows I am not good at holding my tongue and I very rarely bit my lip. But out of respect, I managed to just say ‘You know what? I am leaving.’ and not any of the other many, many things that were running across my mind at that point. I then picked up my shit and left.
That night (and quite honestly right at this moment) I felt an array of emotions. I was angry, bewildered, confused, pissed, hurt. But the one that stuck out the most was disappointment. Sometimes shit has to happen for you to see if your expectations are hitting the mark. In this case I was way off, but trust it’s been adjusted.
