Those of you who know me know that my squad of friends is mostly comprised of guys. This is how it is, how it always has been and probably how it will always be. Up until high school I only had two female friends. And even then I only gained three more. Add on to that the two more I met in college and you have the total number of females that I have ever really fucked with like that.
For some reason, broads and I have never quite clicked. I figure it has something to do with my extremely low tolerance for bullshit and drama, a trait not intrinsic to most women. But the reasons I always heard were complete and utter bullshit. Things like, ‘Oh, that bitch thinks she is cute.’ To which I would usually respond, ‘Yeah, ok and?’ I mean really what the hell am I supposed to think. Or there was ‘Why the hell she gotta always be with a bunch of dudes?’ I think this perturbed them more than anything because these dudes were the ones all the girls liked and I had the inside track. But the reason that always threw me for a loop was the one about my walk. Never quite grasped how you could decide you wanted to fight someone because of the way they walked. Ah, but again that is the bullshit and drama I mentioned. Besides, in knowing me you know that I could really give a shit what most people think of me. As long as I am comfortable with the chick I see in the mirror I am good.
Hanging with a bunch of dudes and having them become more like family than friends has one major pro and one major con. Namely your eternal placement in the ‘sister’ bracket, which comes with a whole other set of cool and not so cool situations.
TEN THINGS I LOVE ABOUT HAVING MOSTLY MALE FRIENDS
- You get a different understanding of how the male mind works. Which results in a different perspective on how the game works.
- You never have to look for someone to help you move.
- They are ready to kill any dude who comes close to hurting your feelings.
- Their potential girlfriends worry about meeting you, cause they know your opinion is critical.
- They give you the truth straight, no chaser and will dare not to be willing to swallow it.
- Because the relationship is so close you sometimes get to see a sensitive side of them that not even their girlfriends see. (i.e.-they will cry in front of you without the fear of being looked at as weak.)
- There is very little conversation while the game is on.
- If you drink too much and fall asleep you don’t have to worry about anyone trying anything.
- You can cry in front of them and they won’t think they have the upper hand in the relationship.
- If ya’ll have a falling out about something there are very little dramatics. You get it off your chest and keep it moving.
TEN THINGS I HATE ABOUT HAVING MOSTLY MALE FRIENDS
- They forget you are a woman and have a tendency point out other women’s asses
- They want you to hook them up with any new female acquaintances.
- They rarely approve of any guy you are dating. And are usually right about dude in the end.
- You end up doing a lot of the cooking.
- They know entirely too much about your sex life. (and vise versa)
- Their girlfriends usually are suspicious of you on the low.
- They want you to run interference (see: lie for their asses) when they screw up. Cause after all you are a woman and the girlfriend will believe you before she believes any of his homeboys.
- If you realize you feelings for one of them, you can’t say anything for fear of how it will affect the friendship.
- Whenever ya’ll are out you have to make sure the guy eyeing you knows these are you brothers and nothing more before he will even think about approaching you.
- Guys you date always think you have, are or will sleep with one or more of them. Or at the very least that one of them has, is or will try to sleep with you.
