As I tie up the loose ends on what I consider to be my first real relationship in a number of years, I struggle. I struggle with myself trying to make sure I don't end up adding my very own chapter to the Diary of An Angry Black Woman, because like most of the women I know I could very easily add a few chapters to this book. They might read something like this:
Chapter 1: Oh no he didn't?
Chapter 2: What the hell do I look like? He must think I am stupid.
Chapter 3: Me vs. Her. How did he go from Suga to Shit?
But I digress....
So one day last week I got into my 'Phuck A Man' mode and before I knew it I was running down all the things that were ever wrong with every dude I have ever dealt with in my entire life. I started remembering everything from the dude who would cut me off during conversations to the dude who couldn't keep it up. And the more I thought I found myself getting pissed and angry and bitter.
But then I thought about the bitter women I know, both young and old and decided I would not allow myself to become a member of that squad. So once I decided I didn't want to be a contributing author to the Bitter Bitch Handbook, (cause that is really all it is) I decided to figure out what positive things have I taken from the men I have let near my heart. Some were boyfriends and some were 'special friends' but they are all irreplaceable in my life. So here they are......
(And remember this list consists of ONLY the good)
The High School BF 1st boyfriend, 15-16 yrs old. He gave me my first real appreciation for hip-hop and showed me how far a dude will go if he wants to be with you.
The Teenage Sweetheart: 16-18. He gave me a rather pleasurable first sexual experience and always made sure he kissed me with lots of passion. I never felt more sexy and desirable then when I was with him.
The College Boo: 18-22. He showed me two very important things: 1) When a man tells you what he is capable of, believe him. and 2.) Friendship can be a powerful tie to a person.
The College Boo Part Duex: 21-23. (Yeah some of them overlap, so what?) He showed me how a true and complete gentleman behaves. I was always a priority and that was truly major.
The Replenisher: 23-24. He renewed my faith that love was real and reminded me how good it feels to allow myself to truly feel.
The Teacher: 25. He showed me that I had to capability to compromise and helped me to appreciate the fragile side of being a woman.
So these are six of the men who have impacted my life and heart and even though there was a lot of good and a lot of bad with each, I will choose to focus on the good. And I will remember this each time I want to go into 'Phuck A Man" mode. This is my list of Relationship Keepsakes.
What positive can you take from past relationships? What is on your Relationship Keepsake list?
Chapter 1: Oh no he didn't?
Chapter 2: What the hell do I look like? He must think I am stupid.
Chapter 3: Me vs. Her. How did he go from Suga to Shit?
But I digress....
So one day last week I got into my 'Phuck A Man' mode and before I knew it I was running down all the things that were ever wrong with every dude I have ever dealt with in my entire life. I started remembering everything from the dude who would cut me off during conversations to the dude who couldn't keep it up. And the more I thought I found myself getting pissed and angry and bitter.
But then I thought about the bitter women I know, both young and old and decided I would not allow myself to become a member of that squad. So once I decided I didn't want to be a contributing author to the Bitter Bitch Handbook, (cause that is really all it is) I decided to figure out what positive things have I taken from the men I have let near my heart. Some were boyfriends and some were 'special friends' but they are all irreplaceable in my life. So here they are......
(And remember this list consists of ONLY the good)
The High School BF 1st boyfriend, 15-16 yrs old. He gave me my first real appreciation for hip-hop and showed me how far a dude will go if he wants to be with you.
The Teenage Sweetheart: 16-18. He gave me a rather pleasurable first sexual experience and always made sure he kissed me with lots of passion. I never felt more sexy and desirable then when I was with him.
The College Boo: 18-22. He showed me two very important things: 1) When a man tells you what he is capable of, believe him. and 2.) Friendship can be a powerful tie to a person.
The College Boo Part Duex: 21-23. (Yeah some of them overlap, so what?) He showed me how a true and complete gentleman behaves. I was always a priority and that was truly major.
The Replenisher: 23-24. He renewed my faith that love was real and reminded me how good it feels to allow myself to truly feel.
The Teacher: 25. He showed me that I had to capability to compromise and helped me to appreciate the fragile side of being a woman.
So these are six of the men who have impacted my life and heart and even though there was a lot of good and a lot of bad with each, I will choose to focus on the good. And I will remember this each time I want to go into 'Phuck A Man" mode. This is my list of Relationship Keepsakes.
What positive can you take from past relationships? What is on your Relationship Keepsake list?
